The Straightedge Suntan

Got this e-mail today: Here is a funny one you may or may not have heard: _“AS” from Unit Pride…during that last “tour” when everyone in the band wasn’t straight edge anymore, but coincidentally decided that they weren’t going to drink or smoke anymore right before tour, but not claim straightedge…that time: _ First day in NY, we were hanging out with the guys from Up Front at Jeff’s house. We go out to the pool and “AS” takes off his shirt. Tanned into his back was a HUGE X. Thats right…tanned into his back, actually, the X was super white and the rest of his back was tan. We start laughing and ask him about the big X and questioned him about claiming to not be straight edge. He tried to tell us that he “accidentally” layed on a piece of tape while laying out one day and when he turned over to tan his back, he didn’t notice the perfectly straight piece of tape, with clean cuts at both ends, running diagonally across his back (only in one direction). When he was done laying out, he finally noticed the piece of tape on his back. He then peeled the tape off, noticed he had a ridiculous white diagonal stripe across his back, and decided that he would put on another perfectly straight piece of tape on his back the next day, going the opposite direction, to balance out the white stripe. So I’m guessing he thought that we would actually believe that after he layed out the next day, the tape he put on would magically erase the tan that he already had on his back and the white stripe he already had would also not get any color. I wish I had a picture of it, it was a perfectly shaped X across his entire back that was super white against his dark tan. He also told everyone he was Buddhist and a vegetarian on that tour, and when he was caught eating a hamburger from McDonalds, he said that as long as it didn’t satisfy him and he prayed for forgiveness afterwards, it was ok to eat meat.

January 18, 2007 .:.